Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
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