That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
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