I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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