I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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