Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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