honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
