How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
