He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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