I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize