i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
