Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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