I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize