he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Randomize
