My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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