I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
