in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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