I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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