My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
