i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Send help, water and tortillas.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
