with your own penis?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
