..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
