This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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