NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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