You just made me feel so damn special
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Randomize
