with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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