If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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