we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
