i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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