Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
