According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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