have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
