Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize
