he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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