Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
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