i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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