bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
