just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
