college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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