So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize