I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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