yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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