ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
