my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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