i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
