One girl and one boy is just not enough.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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