And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
