champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
