Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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