Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
