It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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