She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize